i can laugh

someone has again reminded me that I haven't been posting. I don't know how many people read this anyway. I keep feeling like I don't have much important to post. I've been thinking about a lot of stuff lately, and it's stuff that is really significant to me, but I don't know if it's all that significant to anyone else. I've been mostly encouraged. Getting a lot better about trusting that God is really good. Things in my life that have seemed so scary before aren't seeming so scary. I read proverbs 31 the other day and a verse really stuck out to me: "she can laugh at the days to come". I've been praying a lot about that lately, that's how I want to be. I don't want to worry about the days to come, but be able to laugh at them. No matter what happens, I know that I'm taken care of and I can approach my future with hope and joy.

mourning

Lately it seems like life is a constant state of mourning. You stop mourning one thing to find that you're mourning for someone or something else. I might sound a little strange saying this but I kinda like it. I like feeling my heart break for the brokenness of the world, for the loss of beautiful things. In the vast sea of my countless messed up responses, this feels like a light in the darkness. I'm doing something right. I feel God's heart in my mourning. I feel closer to Him because I'm doing what He's doing. And then I feel hopeful. And it makes me smile.