Thursday, September 09, 2004

tired

Today was really draining. I'm not quite sure why. I just got hit with this extreme fatigue tonight. Sigh . . . I opened a bank account this morning and was hit with the fact that I don't know where I'll be living in about a month and a half. My parents don't give me much room to forget that fact too. So I stepped up the job hunting today and applied for 8 more on monstertrak. Hopefully I'll find something soon. But when I was finally filling out the paperwork to get paid today at my temporary job, Karl (the office manager) was saying that if I'm still here in 3 months, he'll have to do something about insurance. They don't seem in a hurry to get rid of me. Although the situation is a little hectic, especially with the traffic, it seems like it's a place for me to be right now. I also realized this morning that I haven't really been giving things over to God. I've been letting them get me frustrated, but not really asking God about them. I tried today. I feel like I'm not sure again what it means to give something over to God, but that usually happens when you're trying to do that. We'll see what happens :).

I just feel kinda overwhelmed today, and I really don't understand why. It's not like I'm doing very much, but I have no energy to do stuff or talk to people, and I just feel like people only have negative things to talk about. People like to talk about what they see wrong with their lives and what they need. I guess my blog entry is mostly like that right now (funny huh?). I don't think it's bad in general. I think that we need to talk about the things we're not satisfied with, but I'm feeling like I need to be more thankful for stuff. When you're thankful, everything seems better.

So anyway, tomorrow I'm going to korean aerobics (bright and early) and run some errands, pack, then off camping. I don't know where we're going camping or really who we're going camping with (except Sharon and Ed and that the rest of them are from anime expo). It should be good though. I'm looking forward to some time with nature, taking in God's beauty. We are gonna get to go fishing! I also got the EIT review manual in the mail today, so we're taking that camping with us :). I'll try to take some pictures so I can share with everyone when I get back :).

3 comments:

jon said...

So I tell you I'm having to deal with negative conversations with others, while I speak negatively to you, and you speak negatively to me, then I complain to krislin that all my interactions are negative, while I speak about negative stuff to her and she speaks negative stuff to me, then you blog negatively, while complaining about how everyone (myself obviously prominently involved) is saying negative things. We can be wonderful sometimes, eh? Thank God, though, that we have each other. Wallowing in negativity is not good, but going through it together is better than going alone.

Anonymous said...

What I originally thought of posting didn't seem like it would be helpful. Instead I'll say something happy.

Last night I went to my high school's first football game of the season. We won 14-12. More importantly, I got to talk with my old band director the whole time and see the band in action. It brought back a lot of great memories.

-Philip

Anonymous said...

I think you hit the nail on the head with "when you're thankful, everything seems better." Except that when you're thankful to God, and praising Him, it doesn't just "seem" better - it IS. He is doing stuff even when you're not... finding you a place and a job and anything else you might need (including a break from negativity).

One of the best ways to give things to God is to try praising Him for them, whatever state things are in. Put on a song and make up some new lyrics that fit, or take some time to do the dancing you want to do. :-)
+Jordy